An encounter with Mike/Sam this am. Several weeks ago, said to me "I want you dead."
p.s. This morning I ran into a person who's been threatening, on a regular basis, for a good ten months. Meaning, this person (goes by 2 names, Mike and/or Sam, waiting to get his full name for legal reasons) was in a bloody fight, in which I was involved in breaking up. There's much much more to this story, or situation than I'm saying, or want to say here. Suffice it to say, this person tried to apologize and act friendly this morning in front of a person we both know. It was completely inadequate given the nature and seriousness of his threatening behavior over the past months and the rage he has directed towards me.
I've kept myself from engaging him to avoid drama, and worse (I do have 6-7 years of martial arts training), and still not act like anything was okay. I certainly did not accept his attempt at an apology, because it was essentially a lie, convenient, manipulative.
I'm blogging this for a couple of reasons:
- This kind of stuff is part the process of building CSR Direct Services, and the CSR web development projects. It's part my story, my experience doing this work.
- It's also fertile ground for social discussion. What kinds of situations do you find yourself in, how did you get there, were there ways to avoid it? But also, do you stand up when the situation warrants it. Do you know how to stand up or speak up in a difficult situation? Do you know what to say, but not confident enough to you liking?
These are all very good questions that each of us needs to ask. Because life is.... life. Unpredictable, even for the most safety conscious.
This was certainly another opportunity to see how I handle situations like this. And, for the most part, I feel good about what I've been doing. It's fairly difficult to know how to handle situations like this until one is in it. There are too many unforeseen feelings and memories that can and will be triggered, even for the most healthy. Especially for men. Yet, society in general does a very poor job of preparing both Men and Women to handle difficult situations.
For me, I'm very glad for the decades of personal work and experience that's prepared me for stuff like this. I remember deliberately facing my demons and weaknesses, decades ago. So, I pull from many aspects of my life experiences and skills.
That's all for now, but stay tuned!
*p.s. means that this is an additional entry after posting from my phone, an experience or subject on which I need or want to write more.
